Dakota has truly been a gift from God. Through Dakota, God has shown me amazing amounts of grace, I am honestly on my knees praising God for this wonderful, Godly young man.
As Dakota's proud step-mom, I like to think that I have taught him a whole lot and got him through high school. This is far from the truth. Today is Kota's last day of high school, he will be graduating in just two short weeks and will "officially" get his diploma and be opening a new chapter of his life. The reality of this is really hitting me right now and I have been reflecting on the past 5 years that I have been blessed with.
In 5 years God has used Kota to teach me so many life lessons! I have learned and now LOVE the game of football. I have learned (thanks to Kota's lack of a filter and pure honesty) what goes on inside a teenage boy's mind- yeah that was scary but insightful. I have learned to let go when I really want to hang on for dear life because "I know what's best for him" and "I want to protect him from hurt and pain." I have learned to pick up the pieces after he has fallen- with music and games- not always with talking (boys don't like talking about feelings!). I have learned that more than "talking" about things to let him know I was there- I just needed to show him. I have learned arguing about his stuff laying around is not worth it- it is more important to save the argument for more important things and not exasperate him with the little stuff- you will get much more cooperation with the big stuff when you need it. I have learned that the best conversations happen while we cook dinner together- not when I "plan" to have an organized conversation.
I have learned all these things through HUGE amounts of grace that Dakota has shown me. All of the above things- I have frustrated him with to no end. I have failed him in so many ways by doing the wrong thing- but he has been a patient teacher. I am a little slow- so it wasn't an easy process- we have both wanted to pull our hair out several times!!
Positive perseverance is a good word for Dakota. Kota moved to NC with us- hundreds of miles away from his Mom and sister starting a new life in NC with a new step-mom and new little step-brothers. New high school, new church, new friends- and he took it all in stride, just persevering positively with little to no complaining. School has not been easy for Kota his entire life and he has struggled but he persevered. Kota persevered through the annoying moments of his new little brothers, the frustrating moments of his step-mom not having a clue what to do with a teenage boy and in the process he has taught us all so many things about life.
I have no question that God hand picked Kota to be my child- I had a lot to learn and needed to learn from somebody patient. I think it appropriate that Kota won the P.R.I.D.E award his senior year- showing he was recognized for the following characteristics Positive, Respect, Integrity, Display self control and Excellence.
So while I like to sit back and think- yeah all that arguing about Kota needing to study for a vocab test, do his homework, bring home his notes and writing note cards so we could study has finally paid off, he is graduating!!! No- all that positive perseverance that Kota has displayed has paid off. I have realized that while God has given me the job of being responsible for Kota, I was the one learning while he was in high school.
Congrats Kota- you did it- you persevered through high school and you persevered through your crazy family :-) You passed your English exam- with a D...but I have never been so proud of a D in all my life- way to go buddy- I love you always and I am proud to be your step-mom!!!! I will try not to get too many tears on your cap and gown!!
Friday, May 27, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Spoiled Americans?
Pondering this scripture:
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
16. Rejoice always
17. Pray Continually
18. Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Thinking about this scripture for the past couple of days I couldn't help but think of how spoiled I am and how thankless I really am most of the time. Being a mom has taught me a lot!! My boys have been acting so spoiled and thankless a lot of the time so I started an activity with them in the mornings on the way to school. I thought it would be a good idea to start our day by telling God what 3 (minimum) things we are thankful for. If we start the day positive by giving thanks to God our minds will be set on God and giving thanks rather than starting the "woe is me" bit. Funny how I started this for my children and realized how much I really needed this!
I don't follow politics that much (please no stone throwing!) but I know enough to know that our government is corrupt because of greed and sin. I often hear much complaining about where our country is headed and how horrible our leaders are. This is true, all true but for some reason which we have no idea God has chosen these people in leadership over us, Romans 13:1 Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established.
Do we give thanks for the leaders we have? We are told to give thanks in all circumstances. I know I sure don't think to do that very often-to be honest it is even hard to think about anything to be thankful for with most of them!!
How can I be thankful though? Some circumstances are difficult, suffering from an illness, money problems, divorce, children. In all that I say here I am NOT taking away from any of these sufferings or saying they are easy nor is it easy to look at the blessing in them because they surely are not easy to find in the midst of suffering!! Am I able to find things to be thankful for in these circumstances though? I can remember a couple of years ago when I had my kidney stone, I was complaining to my sweet, wise husband saying that this was taking forever to be done with! In his gentle, loving way he told me that rather than complaining I could be thankful for being in America. People in other parts of the world do not have access to medicines, doctors and hospitals the way we do! How often do I complain about the medicine we have to take or the doctor bill I have to pay (which is outrageous!!) rather than really putting things into perspective and falling to our knees thanking God for placing me in America where we have this luxury!
Am I REALLY thankful for our ability to go to church? being able to posses a bible? being able to go to the doctor? our home? electricity? water? car? TV? DVD player? computer? cell phone? The list is endless- all things listed above are things I tend to think of as necessities. What if God chose for me all of a sudden to remove all of these things- I would be lost. Simply being able to turn on the water in our home is a luxury I take for granted- how many people around the world are dying because they don't have clean drinking water? How many people make their houses out of cow dung? How many people die because of a simple infection because there is no antibiotics? How many people starve to death? How many people have to WALK miles and miles just to get to work every day- for the $2.00/week they get? Talk about getting underpaid and under appreciated!! How many children can't go to school because they can't afford it? How many people are being put in prison or killed for believing in Christ?
I know this scripture has really got me thinking about how thankful I am to be an American and I have been able to really put my own complaining in perspective. Corrupt as our government is- it could be much, much worse! I am thankful to live in America- land of the free.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
16. Rejoice always
17. Pray Continually
18. Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Thinking about this scripture for the past couple of days I couldn't help but think of how spoiled I am and how thankless I really am most of the time. Being a mom has taught me a lot!! My boys have been acting so spoiled and thankless a lot of the time so I started an activity with them in the mornings on the way to school. I thought it would be a good idea to start our day by telling God what 3 (minimum) things we are thankful for. If we start the day positive by giving thanks to God our minds will be set on God and giving thanks rather than starting the "woe is me" bit. Funny how I started this for my children and realized how much I really needed this!
I don't follow politics that much (please no stone throwing!) but I know enough to know that our government is corrupt because of greed and sin. I often hear much complaining about where our country is headed and how horrible our leaders are. This is true, all true but for some reason which we have no idea God has chosen these people in leadership over us, Romans 13:1 Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established.
Do we give thanks for the leaders we have? We are told to give thanks in all circumstances. I know I sure don't think to do that very often-to be honest it is even hard to think about anything to be thankful for with most of them!!
How can I be thankful though? Some circumstances are difficult, suffering from an illness, money problems, divorce, children. In all that I say here I am NOT taking away from any of these sufferings or saying they are easy nor is it easy to look at the blessing in them because they surely are not easy to find in the midst of suffering!! Am I able to find things to be thankful for in these circumstances though? I can remember a couple of years ago when I had my kidney stone, I was complaining to my sweet, wise husband saying that this was taking forever to be done with! In his gentle, loving way he told me that rather than complaining I could be thankful for being in America. People in other parts of the world do not have access to medicines, doctors and hospitals the way we do! How often do I complain about the medicine we have to take or the doctor bill I have to pay (which is outrageous!!) rather than really putting things into perspective and falling to our knees thanking God for placing me in America where we have this luxury!
Am I REALLY thankful for our ability to go to church? being able to posses a bible? being able to go to the doctor? our home? electricity? water? car? TV? DVD player? computer? cell phone? The list is endless- all things listed above are things I tend to think of as necessities. What if God chose for me all of a sudden to remove all of these things- I would be lost. Simply being able to turn on the water in our home is a luxury I take for granted- how many people around the world are dying because they don't have clean drinking water? How many people make their houses out of cow dung? How many people die because of a simple infection because there is no antibiotics? How many people starve to death? How many people have to WALK miles and miles just to get to work every day- for the $2.00/week they get? Talk about getting underpaid and under appreciated!! How many children can't go to school because they can't afford it? How many people are being put in prison or killed for believing in Christ?
I know this scripture has really got me thinking about how thankful I am to be an American and I have been able to really put my own complaining in perspective. Corrupt as our government is- it could be much, much worse! I am thankful to live in America- land of the free.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Preparing for Guests
So this is a struggle I think many of us have- at least I hope we do or I am really putting myself out there :-) We make plans with a friend, make arrangements for dinner guests or even just a play date- in the hours before we run around like a chicken with our head cut off trying to make everything "perfect" or "acceptable" for our guests. If somebody is coming over for dinner we try to make our "best" or "favorite" dish- we pull out all the stops.
This past summer a wise young girl said to me, "I really don't like going crazy cleaning our house before people come over- I feel like I am living a lie because this isn't how our house normally is." I thought about that for a bit and then thought, well she will understand when she is older. It is funny though, every time I was preparing for a guest I would hear her little voice in the back of my head.
Cleaning is not the love of my life- I would much rather be doing other things, not that we live in filth because we don't, I clean it just isn't my favorite thing! My scripture several months ago (thanks to an amazing women's retreat!) was Titus 2:4-5, "Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Being busy in the home really stuck with me and motivated me to be constantly "doing." Boy did I miss the ball- as usual :-) Sorry boys- can't play right now, doing laundry- sorry boys can't read a book- I'm cleaning. Really?! Is cleaning more important than this precious short time I have with my boys before they are grown? Isn't being busy caring for your children and training them? Of course...but I am a little slow. Don't get me wrong my children need clean clothes and we can't live in filth- so these things need to be done but not constantly- it is a balance- not one I have perfected or even come close so don't ask me how :-)
So my scripture this week is Col 3:23 "Whatever you do, work at it with your whole heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." which I promptly placed on my microwave- doing dishes is painful for all of us :-) This scripture got me thinking though- what if Jesus was our dinner guest? How would I prepare for Him? I should prepare dinner for my family, clean- everything as unto the Lord. So...how would I prepare for Him? My first thought- oh man I would need to get down on my hands and knees and scrub the base boards, wash windows, scrub the walls- oh no I have a lot of work to do before the family gets home- I am SLACKING!! Then I thought- if Jesus came as our dinner guest- would He walk in and say "Hey Michelle those base boards look fantastic, I am so pleased you cleaned them before I came!" Yeah- sounds silly even saying it right? He cares about what is in my heart not the dirt in the corners of my home. What do you think He would want me to do? Go crazy cleaning to impress Him or prepare my heart for him?
Am I preparing my house to impress our guests by exhausting myself and exasperating my family or am I pleasing the Lord by preparing my heart for the guest's arrival so I can please Him in my actions when the guests arrive? I am sad to say that I tend to want to impress my guests by exhausting myself, exasperating my family to have a nice looking exterior when I am really serving leftovers.
Thank you to that dear child whose voice has been in the back of my head...you made me come to realize instead of you understanding when you were older- I needed to understand.
Monday, May 17, 2010
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